Commitment and dependency in relationships are very different concepts. While your commitment to your relationship makes the relationship healthier and more trustworthy, your dependence on the relationship makes it more unhealthy and needy.
In bonded relationships, individuals trust, respect and love each other. They spend more quality time together. They respect each other’s decisions and opinions. When making decisions, they care about what he will think and feel and act accordingly. Couples have their own space. Relationships are not the only focus in her life. They have their own interests, hobbies, circle of friends and social lives. The boundaries of the relationship are clear and both parties respect it. They support each other and are proud of his achievements. In connected relationships, there are perceptions of 2 bodies, 2 souls, and 2 minds. They do not have purposes of complementing each other. Because they are already two separate people and they are complete on their own.
In dependent relationships, the individual puts the wishes, thoughts and happiness of the other party above everything else. He shapes his lifestyle according to his partner. They have one body, one soul, and a need for completion. They do not accept them as individuals, they think they belong to them. These people have extreme jealousy, fear of loss and fear of abandonment. They have a hard time saying no. They don’t even think about saying no, especially if they have a very intense commitment. Because the desire of their partner is paramount and they are very afraid of losing him. Even if they are unhappy in their relationship, they continue. The idea of ’I can’t do without it’ prevails. They feel uncomfortable when their partner is in front of them. It bothers him that his partner is liked and appreciated by people. He is overly concerned and has a pathological altruism. These people may be exposed to emotional, physical and sexual abuse. They cannot draw boundaries about the relationship and the person feels inadequate and worthless after a point in this relationship process. Individuals in addicted relationships have high self-esteem, anxiety disorder, depression, alcohol or substance use, and self-harm tendencies. Individuals with addicted relationships need to receive psychological support and realize the situation. We have all encountered toxic people at some point in our lives. Toxic people act as if they are the only ones suffering in this world and as if they are carrying the burden of the whole world. They talk about themselves all the time and always want to be at the forefront. While they always expect attention and love from you, they do not give you the same attention and love. These people are very pessimistic and they suck the positive energy inside you. They even get annoyed that you are happy. If something important to you is not important in their value judgment, what you care about is nothing in their eyes. For example, they tend to lower your mood with condescending reactions such as why are you so happy when you tell something nice about yourself, or with reactions such as I don’t think it’s funny when talking about something funny. When life is so precious, use your time and attention for people who make you feel special and valuable. Because toxic people will always continue to consume you.
