Surfing with impulses

Surfing with Impulses

There are times when the sea is very wavy. Waves are sometimes larger and sometimes smaller. However, even if the surfer struggles as long as he can keep his balance and control, the height of the waves will not affect the result.

The life line is like the waves in the sea. It has an output. With anger, blood splashes into your brain, you turn your eyes away, you burn and wash everything in front of you. Or you have experienced events that tire you and upset you, and you find yourself in front of the refrigerator or in front of a snack bowl. At such times, it is necessary to realize that the control is out of your hands and passes to your primitive self (id).

Being aware of the emotion (eg, anger or sadness) being experienced at the moment and putting a distance between the emotion and behavior (eg, burning down or choking) is the first step to take in order to regain control. At this point, we ask ourselves, “Yes, I am sad/angry right now, but will the behavior I want to do resolve my feeling in the long run?” we can ask the question.

In such cases, postponing the behavior we want to do for 15 minutes and diverting our attention to other things (eg, talking to friends on the phone or browsing Instagram) causes us to lose our desire to do that thing.

Every time this request comes, being able to achieve the aforementioned procrastination behavior will help us to dance and cope with our impulses or desires, just like a surfer dances with the waves.